Sharon's Muse.... Let's chat over coffee while I ponder some things

About Me

My Meez


Recent Entries



Interesting Sites




In Stores

Watch mini trailer

Clip of places featured in Again

Need Flashplayer to view. Give time to load.


Short, Short Ebooks

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Obviously I'm not fuckable enough

I'm still steaming from an incident this morning at Walgreens which harps back to Debra Dickerson's complaint a few months ago in Salon. In her article, Ms. Dickerson wrote about the lack of respect black women receive due to our supposed low "fuckability" quotient. I didn't agree with her whole analysis, but I did agree that a lot of times black women don't get courtesy for any number of reasons. Actually, this morning's incident is probably based more on lookism than racism, but even so is still a sad example of how inequitable this youth- and appearance-obsessed society is .

Let me elaborate on what happened: I run inside Walgreens to pick up a few things before work. This early in the morning, employees and vendors are shelving items. This means a lot of the aisles are blocked with boxes and it is an obstacle course of squeezing past vendors and other shoppers. Anyway, I go to turn down an aisle and a vendor is kneeling on the floor near a stack of boxes leaving me no room to enter. He looks up at me, but instead of getting up and making room, he scoots forward, basically forcing me to step over him.

Not a minute later, a young woman, attractive and white, comes down the opposite direction and approaches him. Not only does this guy (who happens to be white or hispanic) stand up, but he moves back to give her the whole aisle that's available around the boxes.

As I pass him, I verbalize my outrage with an audible "asshole" then go to work, where I convince myself that I had indeed been disrespected and call the manager at the store, relating what aisle and the incident. The manager assures me he knows which guy it is and that the incident was wrong. He also promises to speak to the guy or the guy's manager about it (as the man is an outside vendor, he is not under Walgreen's supervision).

In retrospect, I don't think I am being supersensitive, nor do I think I misread the situation.

The guy was courteous to the one he would more like to fuck. That's my take on it. If I had been younger, a certain type, I am sure he would have gotten up as opposed to forcing me to step over him.

Whatever -ism was operating here (probably a mix), it's a slap in the face, and I don't let insults go unchallenged. If anything ageism should have been operating in my favor, as I'm older and am due a certain level of respect over a mere 20-something (am I being ageist here?).

So my question to the man (who appeared to be in his late twenties): Would you want someone treating your mother that way? Or maybe your mother has a higher fuckability quotient and men automatically move out of her way and give her due courtesy. Or maybe they give her due courtesy simply because she is a fellow human being.

To the male readers here, tell me your take on it? Am I being supersensitive? I want to know.

Sharon Cullars Coffee Talk at 11/08/2005 05:54:00 AM Permanent Link     | | Home


Layout Design by Hajira Thanks to:Getty Images BlogspotBlogskins